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A Moment of Surrealism

So it’s about 1 AM last night, I can’t sleep, I’m in front of the TV channel-surfing. A few minutes later, I notice that I’m stuck between 2 channels, both vying for my half-lucid state of attention…

On TV Land, they’re showing ElectraWoman & DynaGirl. This brilliant outing is episode 1.2. As in Season 1 Episode 2. There was only one season, mind you. Now that’s optimism. Who’s the ass-clown that wrote this show’s pilot and said, “Oh yeah, this puppy is my retirement vehicle!” Anyway, episode 1.2 features the arch villain Glitter Rock (pictured), an evil glam-rocker who loves music. Glitter Rock’s sidekick is the cheesy-mustachioed Side Man, who looks more like a lounge singer than an evil sidekick, but hey, nobody asked me, right? Glitter Rock and Side Man trap EW & DG (so abbreviated for my convenience. As a guess, I would say that EW & DG’s fan base, both of them, would call it sacrilege to do so.) in a hallway in which the walls attempt to smoosh them. While EW is trying to solve the crime, DG espouses heartfelt exclamations such as “Electra Smart!” As much as this would glue any viewer between the ages of 4 and 4 and-a-half, I still keep flipping back to…

WAM TV…which is showing the 1976 blockbuster, and I use that term sarcastically, Food of the Gods, which is loosely (I hope) based on the H.G. Wells story of the same name. Now, I’m not sure what Herbert had in mind when he wrote FotG, as I’ve never read it, but if he was thinking he would write a grade C horror flick starring crazy-eyed Marjoe Gortner, then I must avoid the book. Seriously, Gortner has been sporadically haunting my dreams ever since that scene in Earthquake where he terrorizes a big-wigged, tightly t-shirted Victoria Principal (I tried to find the movie image…here’s a hint: Don’t search Google images with her name, or, if you are Pete, go right ahead). Anyway, one cheesy rat-feasting scene was enough to switch me back to EW & DG.

Switching back and forth went on for about 8 minutes. I was no more sleepy, but I was too repulsed to sit anywhere near the TV.

About John DeNardo (13012 Articles)
John DeNardo is the Managing Editor at SF Signal and a columnist at Kirkus Reviews. He also likes bagels. So there.

3 Comments on A Moment of Surrealism

  1. They really sad part is, I remember watching EW & DG on TV. Along with Sigmund and the Seamonster and various other Sid & Marty Krofft ‘contributions’ to TV. I will say ‘Land of the Lost’ was good. I didn’t know why until just now when I googled for it and found this page. Did you know that David Gerrold, Larry Niven and Theodore Sturgeon all were writers for the show? I didn’t either. No wonder it was light-years better then H.R. Puffenstuff…

  2. Oh my! Finding out that Sturgeon wrote for Land of the Lost is like finding out your grandmother was a hooker. It’s just something you’d rather not know.

  3. If you would like to read Food of the Gods you can easily do so – the book is in the public domain and available on the web here.

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